Nadia D'Anvers (part 2)

I met two wonderful little girls today - Lisa and Lili. When I first saw Lili there was something familliar about her, but I couldn't quite place it. When I asked her about her parents, the mystery was solved... she's Kira's daughter. I couldn't believe it! She's looking for Delor. I cried when I found out that she is Kira's daughter... Kira always took care of me - no matter what Grey and Lent said about her!

I spent the afternoon with Darigal, Lisa, and Lili - we fished and then we lay down in the grass and stared up at the clouds. Lisa fell asleep. She is so sweet... even when snoring!

I've spent a lot of time with Darigal lately... he's so sweet and funny. He said he won't let anyone hurt me and called me his best friend. I just hope he doesn't fall victim to the same curse that has befalled everyone else that I've cared deeply for...

~ Nadia

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My feelings for Darigal grow with every day. He is there for me always and does his best to make me smile, even when the sadness overcomes me.

There was a large gathering of Children of the Light in Four Kings today. I was terrified... a couple of them seemed quite eager to have me questioned... or worse... One even picked me up and was going to put me in the fire, but Captain Grey stopped them.

I am so scared... I don't know what I am to do. One does not simply leave the Children of the Light. If they every find out what I can do... Oh... I now can imagine the fear and pain that mother would have felt in her last moments... I also fear I may join her sooner than I would hope...

~ Nadia

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Captain Grey was promoted to Lord Captain today. I suppose the post has been vacant since Lent was killed. I was at the ceremony... Captain Grey is a strong leader and the men follow in his footsteps. I fear for anyone who finds themselves within Grey's sights, as he is quite zealous in his beliefs. I fear...

While at the ceremony I could not help but stare at the large wooden stake in the center of the square used for burning those deemed to be witches. I wonder if that is where they burned my mother. Perhaps I will fall to the same fate in that same spot and rejoin her in the pattern.

Aermannes was taken by the Children the other day. I was there as they tried to make him confess to being a darkfriend. I could not watch the horrible things the Inquisitor did to him... it was all I could do not to run from the room. Had I done that, I'm sure Child Alexander would have finally gotten his wish and had me questioned... if not worse. I must be careful around that one.

I saw Aermannes today... I don't know how he survived, but I'm glad he did. I do not believe him to be a darkfriend... he simply has no love of the Children. I don't know why, but I saw him at Lord Captain Grey's cornation ceremony. Why would he be there? Afterwards I saw him in Four Kings and he gave me a ring. I am worried for him. He says that Saidin is consuming him, but he will not let me help him. He says he cannot trust any of the ash'aman in the area. There is one that I trust though...

~ Nadia

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I met with a girl that Cel sent to meet me about what happened at the river... her name is Sara. She started calling me a witch and saying that everyone would hate me... I remember getting really upset and crying and then the room was filled with smoke. I couldn't see! I was so scared. She told me after that she was sorry she said those things, but she had to see if I could channel... and she told me that I made the smoke.

I don't know what to do... I can't just leave the Children... no one can leave them... but if they ever find out, or even suspect, I'll be seeing my mother sooner than expected.

Aermannes was in town today. He walked by me and whispered that he needed to talk to me. I'm glad that the Lord Captain and Inquisitor didn't hear... though it seemed they didn't recognise him anyways. I'm worried about him... and a little scared too...

~ Nadia

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Today was the lowest I have ever felt. I just wanted everything to end... I remember walking out to the waterfall and opening myself to the power... I remember dust everywhere... I remember losing control of it... When I awoke, I was in the White Tower with Amelie, Harold, and that nice young noble.

My life has changed once more, for as I write this I am now a novice of the White Tower. I know that this is the path that mother would have wanted me to follow - I can learn to help people this way... I want to become a Yellow Ajah and heal those who are sick and injured.

I need to stay away from the Children of the Light now as there will be no hiding what I am anymore. Though I am not to wear my Tower robes when I am outside of the Tower, so perhaps I can remain hidden for a short time longer...

~ Nadia